Oklahoma, Hold On, I'm Coming if you Give me that Piece o land!
It is always said not to fall for the myth that the grass is greener on the other side of the hill. And frankly, when a good friend of mine send me the following content in an email with the message: “Moving to Oklahoma tomorrow” I wondered about his sanity and after reading it I wondered about the driving force behind his motivation to send it to me.
I know he’s a strong proponent of the South Rising Again, which rally cry I seem to remember from a Chary Daniels song, but still. I’ll share it with you, just in the same way he sent it to me. Let me know if you sympathize, so I can tell him to get the caravan going west ready.
Moving to Oklahoma? – Moving there tomorrow!
Oklahoma is the only state that Obama did not win even one county in the last election…
While everyone is focusing on Arizona’s new law, look what Oklahoma has been doing!!!!
An update from Oklahoma :
Oklahoma law passed, 37 to 9 an amendment to place the Ten Commandments on the front entrance to the state capitol. The feds in D.C., along with the
ACLU, said it would be a mistake. Hey this is a conservative state, based on Christian values…! HB 1330
Guess what……….Oklahoma did it anyway.
Oklahoma recently passed a law in the state to incarcerate all illegal immigrants, and ship them back to where they came from unless they want to get a green card and become an American citizen. They all scattered. HB 1804.
This was against the advice of the Federal Government, and the ACLU, they said it would be a mistake.
Guess what……….Oklahoma did it anyway.
Recently we passed a law to include DNA samples from any and all illegal’s to the Oklahoma database, for criminal investigative purposes. Pelosi said it was unconstitutional SB 1102
Guess what……… Oklahoma did it anyway.
Several weeks ago, we passed a law declaring Oklahoma as a Sovereign state, not under the Federal Government directives. Joining Texas, Montana and Utah as the only states to do so. More states are likely to follow: Louisiana , Alabama , Georgia, Carolina’s,Tennessee, Kentucky, Missouri, Arkansas, West Virginia, Mississippi, and Florida.Save your confederate money, it appears the South is about to rise up once again. HJR 1003
The federal Government has made bold steps to take away our guns. Oklahoma, a week ago, passed a law confirming people in this state have the right to bear arms and transport them in their vehicles. I’m sure that was a setback for the criminals. The Liberals didn’t like it.
But…. Guess what……….. Oklahoma did it anyway.
Just this month, the state has voted and passed a law that ALL drivers license exams will be printed in English, and only English, and no other language. They have been called racist for doing this, but the fact is that ALL of the road signs are in English only. If you want to drive in Oklahoma, you must read and write English. Really simple.
By the way, the Liberals don’t like any of this either.
Guess what…who cares… Oklahoma is doing it anyway
I think my friend was testing me. He even sent me a list of the 27 islands that Oklahoma’s lakes and rivers harbor, since he knows I only live on islands. Don’t think that Rattlesnake Island or Two Tree Island will entice me to leave lovely Amelia and as far as the south rising again concerns, the following musings found their way into my archives of 33 years mostly dealing with Southerners.
Why The South Will Do It Again
A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. “Amazing,” he thought as he flew down I-95, pushing the pedal even more.
Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a Florida State Trooper, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, “What am I doing? I’m too old for this!” and pulled over to await the trooper’s arrival.
Pulling in behind him, the trooper got out of his vehicle and walked up to the Corvette. He looked at his watch, then said, “Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a new reason for speeding – a reason I’ve never before heard – I’ll let you go..”
The old gentleman paused then said, “Three years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back.”
“Have a good day, Sir,” replied the trooper.
The owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.
He called her into his office and said, “Y’all graduated from the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I wuz to give yew $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?”
The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, “Everthang but my earrings.”
A senior citizen in Louisiana was overheard saying, “When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana .”
When asked why, he replied, “I’d rather be in Louisiana ’cause everythang happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the world.”
The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his buddy, “Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!”
Bubba replied, “Did y’all see who it was?”
The young man answered, “I couldn’t tell, but I got the license number.”
A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait.
A passerby studied the scene as he drove by, and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was.
The man replied, “I got a flat tahr.”
The passerby asked, “But what’s with the flowers?”
The man responded, “When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back. I never did understand it neither.”
A Tennessee State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper asked, “Got any ID?”
The driver replied, “Bout whut?”
The Sheriff pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out of his pick-up into the ditch. The Sheriff asked, “Why are you dumping garbage in the ditch? Don’t you see that sign right over your head.”
“Yep,” he replied. “That’s why I’m dumpin’ it here, ’cause it says: ‘Fine For Dumping Garbage.’
Y’all kin say whut y’all want ‘about the South, but y’all never heard o’ nobody retirin’ an’ movin’ North. (and even that is changing these days)
So here is a tribute to my friend just in case he decides to move to Oklahoma. He probably forgot that the state lies smack in the middle of Tornado Ally and Carrie Underwood doesn’t live there anymore. And if he’s that forgetful, the following may give him something to think about.
Glad That You Are My Friend
ODE TO MY FRIENDS IN OLD AGE or did I mention that before?
As I was lying around, pondering the problems of the world, I realized that at my age I don’t really give a hoot anymore.
If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, but is still fat.
A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years, while a tortoise doesn’t run and does mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years.
And you tell me to exercise?? I don’t think so.
Just grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune to remember the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Now that I’m older here’s what I’ve discovered:
1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed with prunes and all-bran.
3. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart.
4. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
5. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
6. If all is not lost, then where the heck is it ?
7. It was a whole lot easier to get older, than to get wiser.
8. Some days, you’re the top dog; some days you’re the hydrant.
9. I wish the buck really did stop here; I sure could use a few of them.
10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.
11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
12. It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.
13. The world only beats a path to your door when you’re in the bathroom.
14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he’d have put them on my knees.
15. When I’m finally holding all the right cards, everyone wants to play chess.
16. It’s not hard to meet expenses . . . they’re everywhere.
17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter . . .I go somewhere to get something, and then wonder what I’m “here after”.
19. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
20. HAVE I SENT THIS ??
Did I tell you that I am so glad you are my friend?
In closing I like to leave a footnote on the opening story, that Oklahoma passed a resolution about its sovereignty, it’s not a Law and
I know that Oklahoma is the only state where Obama didn’t carry any one county. That much is true.
Most of the rest would not surprise me.
And furthermore I expect that Oklahoma, like Kansas, will be advertising that they’ll give you free land if you’ll agree to move to their rural counties.