I won the easter egg hunt that year, but 55 years Iater I still remember the look on the face of the chicken
Growing up in a family with 4 brothers and next door to mom’s sister’s family with 3 cousins in the same age group, I remember early childhood Easter Sunday mornings to be a competitive hunt for hard boiled, colored eggs. I also recall that we never worried about cholesterol, bowel stoppage or why my mom or dad stayed home while the rest went to Sunday church and when we came back from the service, the garden was miraculously dotted with “hidden” colored eggs.
The challenge was always to find even the last well hidden egg and our parents didn’t shy away from tricky hiding places. Obviously, he or she, only one cousin was the lonely female in the bunch, who collected most eggs was the winner, but I’m fairly sure there was no award attached to winning the Easter Egg hunt.
In the mid 1950s we had a chicken coop and free range pen in our backyard under the fruit trees, with an estimated 20-25 chickens. The coop was a half cylinder metal bunker with door and windows, loaded with wooden ledges for the chickens to sleep on and side benches to lay their eggs.
My older brother Eef was the designated egg collector in the house, but when one year our mom decided to hide the last colored egg under a nesting chicken, I won. We did not compete for the most eggs, but actually the last egg. It took a good 30 minutes however before I put it all together and another 10 minutes to find the courage to put my hand under the chicken and pull out the egg.
WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?
– Courtesy of James Hurwitz. Be sure to read them all!
SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he’s a maverick!
BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period.
JOHN McCAIN: My friends, the chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.
HILLARY CLINTON: What difference at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road.
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.
DICK CHENEY: Where’s my gun?
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.
AL GORE: I invented the chicken.
JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken’s intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.
AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white?
DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won’t realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he is acting by not taking on his current problems before adding any new problems.
OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross the road so badly. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I’m going to give this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
ANDERSON COOPER: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.
NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he’s guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.
PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way the chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer’s Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I’ve not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.
GRANDPA: In my day we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
BARBARA WALTERS: Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish it’s lifelong dream of crossing the road.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2014, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2014. This new platform is much more stable and will never reboot.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
And lo, the Lord gazed upon the chicken and upon the egg…
And not knowing which should come first,
Shoveth’d He the egg into the chicken.
And it was good…..